I want to preface this by making it clear that I’m not proud of any of this, I didn’t realize until years later how fucked up it all was. I started going to an all-boys boarding school for my first year of high school. I’d always been very tall for my age so for my whole life I’d been the biggest kid in my school, and I developed earlier than the other boys so I was a bit of a bully, but I never did anything too bad before I was introduced to the culture of sexual assault you have in those kind of schools. I was in 9th grade when I saw boys getting forced to give blowjobs and getting penetrated in the showers, and as the largest and strongest boy in the grade it was just expected that I’d be doing it too. It was like a prison environment, hundreds of very horny boys in the throes of puberty all packed together with no girls and little/no access to porn. It just seemed normal to everyone that that’s what happens, the strong take advantage of the weak in that way.
And I joined in, at 14 years old I was regularly fucking the smaller boys in my grade, against their will but they usually didn’t resist. I’m not proud of it but that’s what I was doing. The first one of the day always happened in the showers, there was no privacy in there so everyone was on display and there was a lot of non-consensual sex going in in full view of everyone else. They didn’t mix ages, so the 9th graders only showered with other 9th graders, but at that age there is a lot of variation in levels of development and the under-developed boys were targeted a lot. Every morning I used to walk around until I saw a boy I liked the look of and bend him over, or at least have him suck me off. I wasn’t the only one who did this, most of the large boys got their first nut of the day in the showers, but as the biggest I got 1st pick of victim. There was one boy named Cody who I fucked a lot, he had a very feminine body with long-ish shaggy blond hair, a slim body with a small waist and wide hips, then a big round ass and tiny hairless dick and balls. He was the “prettiest” boy in the school and the closest thing we had to a girl, so everyone wanted a piece of him but as the strongest guy in the grade I always got him when I wanted him. I ended up claiming him for my exclusive use and he got a bit of stockholm syndrome, I protected him from the other boys and he started showing genuine affection to me.
There was a lot of sexual abuse at night too, after lights out. We slept in big dorm rooms, lots of bunk beds crammed tight into one large room. We had school issued pajamas but they were uncomfortable and always too small, so a lot of us just went naked. The small boys who were often the victims of rape didn’t go naked if they could help it to avoid catching the eye of a boy like me and getting him aroused, but sometimes they were made to so we’d have some eye candy. I always had a couple of boys sleeping in my bed with me to fuck before I went to sleep, I had them stay in the bed all night so I had someone to do if I woke up in the night with an erection and first thing in the morning. I kept them naked too for easy access. I had some favorites but generally rotated my sleeping partners to keep it fresh.
It was also normal for rape to be used to establish dominance (also like in prisons), I got into a lot of fights and if I was very angry I sometimes finished it off by anally raping the guy I fought after I beat him down. I did this to a few guys in the higher grades too, with a large group of other kids watching him scream and beg me to stop. I know, very brutal stuff, but I’m sure if I went to a regular school I would never have done anything like that. This stuff was considered normal there, I was just conforming to the culture. That doesn’t excuse my actions, but the context is important. This was in the early 90s, I’ve heard boarding schools have cracked down hard on sexual assault now, but back then it was still rampant.
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